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CarltonTheGod 10:01 Tue Feb 7
What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

My brother in law just reminded me of something that happened a month or 2 ago.

I was at a Charlton match watching a pal of mine play in the KSC. Charlton won the game and I popped into the loo for a slash and I heard a fan say 'On for the treble.'

Upon quizzically asking him what the treble was he replied and I quote.

'Kent Senior Cup, FA cup (in the 3rd round) and FA youth cup.'

As they're top of league I asked why not the league and he replied with. NAAAA NOT IMPORTENT.

I then proceeded to walk out of the toilet laughing.

Cor Blimey 8:04 Fri Feb 10
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Donna Air interviewing the Corrs and asked "where did you meet"

My son, when he was 16, asked "is whistling hereditary"

Moncurs Putting Iron 7:24 Fri Feb 10
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

ohmi 9:53 Thu Feb 9
Is I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles still sung at games?

Aalborg Hammer 5:19 Fri Feb 10
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Hot off the press...I mentioned that Nami Watts would be playing Princess Diana in a new film..."But that's stupid...she looks nothing like Diana...she's black"

kylay 9:07 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

was drowning my sorrows after a particularly cruel ex kicked me to the curb, my friend was trying to console me and said "just remember, if they didn't have a vagina we'd be shooting them out of trees."

MonkeyVulgaris 9:01 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

I was watching the film Colors with a mate and his younger brother, after around an hour my mates brother asked "which one is homes"

McLovin 4:11 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Used to live in a bedsit with my ex-girlfriend while my best mate lived in a room downstairs. He popped in one day and asked if I'd like a real ale he had in the fridge? Before I could answer my missus pipped up "you horrible bastard, you can't keep owls in the fridge, they'll die!" Was laughing so hard a bit of wee came out.

Pi Alpha Nu 1:40 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Bloke at work was having problems with his computer and was told to press Ctrl Alt Delete. His answer was I can't do this as I havn't got enough fingers to press all those letters at the same time.

South West Hammer 1:30 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Years ago I worked in the warehouse at an MFI shop. Many's the time some cowboy builder would come to collect a customer's flat pack kitchen and a routine question of ours was (obviously if it was part of the order) "Do you have room to take the 3 metre worktop?" to which they would regularly reply "I don't know, how long is it?"

Hugh Jargon 1:25 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

That El Hadge Douf managed to flob in the faces of 5000 west ham fans at the same time. Extrodinary.

BillC79 1:01 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Sister in Law once asked why there were no photo's of space during the day.

My wife thought the A-Team were Humphrey Bogarde (Hannibal), Mask (Face), Maverick (Murdoch) and BA.

She also though that Jesus and Mary had baby God.

bill green 1:00 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

i was working for a well known fat cat bonus paying rail co, doing a demo of some new kit. one of the directors gets called out for an update on a worker who had been hit by a train that morning.
he comes back in ashen faced and says 'the worker has succumbed to his injuries'
my boss - a complete tw@t, asks 'is he alright?'
the director looks at the tw@t amazed 'no he's dead'...obviously thinking i must remember to sack this tw@t

cheeses cruyf 12:57 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

I used to work for British Telecom and was in someone's house to fix their phone,a wire had broken off inside the connector box.
With a smile I told the woman the wire had broke and peoples words were falling off the wire, in walks her husband and thats what she told him!
The look he gave me said yeah I know!

Grumpster 12:39 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

I work with a gorgeous blonde who lives up to the stereotype.

Reading the paper once she said, "Why on earth would Brad and Angelina call their baby a silly name like Ophan?" (yep she can't even pronounce ir properly)

Upon reading the article, it stated 'Brad and Angelina's Orphan baby'

Same girl once asked me what county in England, Bermuda was in.

Considering we work in a solicitors and she does the billing, interviews must be a piece of piss!!!

Big Dave 9:44 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Came home one day to find a hedgehog with ticks all over it in the front garden. Decided to take it inside and remove then with sterile tweezers etc. Put it out back with some water under the hedge and, later on, it had wandered off. Flatmate came home a couple of hours later and I told him what happened. He thought for a few seconds and then asked

"Why would someone draw on a hedgehog?"

Willtell 8:28 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

"If Harry Redknapp manages England I won't support them..."

Read it on this forum

Josh 8:20 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

One from the train in, this morning.

Two birds, early 20's (one fit the other not so much) got on a Billericay, one says to the other, "I didn't know Jamie Redknapp and Harry Redknapp were related..."


Yeah, because Redknapp is an extremely popular name.

worm 8:07 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Mrs Worm is in to sparkling water.

The other night she offered me some and I told her I wasn't touching that shit.
I told her "they used that stuff to treat mental patients back in the 60's"

She looks at the bottle for a few seconds then says to me " what does it do then?"

"its a sedative, darlin'"

"oh.......do you think i should stop drinking it?"

"yeah, maybe"

Mr Polite 7:45 Thu Feb 9
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

This thread has made me chuckle a number of times.

A young female friend of mine when watching a Marilyn Monroe film said AND 100% meant it:

'I'd hate to have lived back then - everything in black and white'

penners28 9:42 Wed Feb 8
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

this is 100% genuine. went on holiday with the lads years ago and we saw our mate on the bog....perched on the bowl with the seat up.

we asked him what the fuck he was doing, to which he replied "the seat is just for girls isnt it?"

turns out he had been doing it for years

stomper 9:33 Wed Feb 8
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

penners28 8:23 Wed Feb 8

According to law the official language of Illinois is American

McLovin 8:14 Wed Feb 8
Re: What's the funniest/ most stupid thing you have ever head someone say?

Has to be I let my 'mates' sleep in bed with my missus while I pull an all-nighter on the computer. :-)

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