yngwies Cat 7:30 Tue Apr 3
Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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In a paint off. My money is on Rolf.
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Replies - Newest Posts First ( Show In Chronological Order)
Saul Bollox
9:41 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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I think it was in Bernard Braden's show years ago. Where a group of art aficionados were shown a group of "abstract" paintings and were filmed talking about the use of colour and sense of movement in the various paintings. After their inane ramblings they were introduced to the artists who were two chimpanzees.
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Mad Dog
7:52 Wed Apr 4
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I'd wager half the art critics don't get most of it, but just read whatever they want into it and come out with poncey bollocks in an attempt to be cuntish
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chim chim cha boo
7:35 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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My ex-missus and mother of my daughter is the head of department and lecturer on modern art at a big Australian university and was over a couple of months ago for a meeting with Charles Saachi and a couple of lectures.
I took her to see West Ham (she said it was the highlight of her visit, poor thing) and she took me to an exhibition in St James's that I really didn't get, as much as I tried. I wondered if I'd try and bullshit my way through it but I eventually said 'so what's this all about? I'm struggling with this exhibition'. She whispered back 'I haven't got a fucking clue' and we pissed off pronto for a cup of tea.
I should have married her.
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northernammer
7:20 Wed Apr 4
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sorry but I'm firmly in the emperors new clothes camp.
I can see the attraction with Dali ,Lowry even Picasso. And I can see Hirst has some imagination and it must be classed as art. BUT its the critics that get me. Up thier own arse bullshit merchants, standing on the shoulders of giants.
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Hammer and Pickle
7:11 Wed Apr 4
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There is a lot of smoke and mirrors about art, but it is really very simple.
Take any object of attention, material or linguistic, and strip away the usual meanings people (or rather culture) attach to it by representing it in a surprising way or in a new, unusual context, or create a completely new object with new or mysterious meanings, and you have made art.
Anyone can do this. Children do it all the time and there are plenty of fine artists who post on this site.
Also to make a living out of art is just as much about hard work, career building, corporate and market politics and often highly cynical skullduggery and brown-nosing as any other work, much more so in fact.
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Fivetide
6:54 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2008/09/22/damien-hirst-sets-new-auction-record-with-investment-banker-in-formaldehyde-371/
http://www.newsbiscuit.com/images/1921.jpg
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chim chim cha boo
6:33 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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Peroni
'Spalding, who was director of galleries in Sheffield, Manchester and Glasgow, where he promoted artists including LS Lowry and Beryl Cook, added: "It's often been proposed, seriously, that Damien Hirst is a greater artist than Michelangelo because he had the idea for a shark in a tank whereas Michelangelo didn't have the idea for his David'.
Really? Show me someone who knows about art who has 'often proposed' that Hurst is a greater artist that Michelangelo'? Absolute bollocks.
Also, he promoted Beryl Cook? Beryl fucking Cook? Beryl 'fat cunts getting on a bus' Cook?
This Spalding bloke comes out with some crackers to try and grab a headline or two. I wonder why?
'Spalding's latest book, Con Art - Why You Ought to Sell Your Damien Hirst While You Can - is published next month'.
Oh...
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Fivetide
6:26 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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This video will make you like or dislike Hirst, art critics and the art world.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rESmxFXAd8
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peroni
6:22 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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Classic Emperor's new clothes syndrome.
It's not art at all. Having an idea isn't art. Conveying that idea through a special talent and creating something physical yourself makes it art. He must be pissing himself. I don't want to offend anyone but anyone who pretends to get it has displayed a mental weakness.
Here's a couple of good articles on the "con".
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-17523671
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2123346/Con-art-The-genius-Damien-Hirst.html
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chim chim cha boo
6:10 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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That's a bit different though Gaz. The old masters lived in a time when there was no TV, not much colour in the world and crucially no photography.
Once photography kicked off people said it was the death of painting and then the impressionists came along and kicked-off modern art. There's a reason (which is obvious once you see it) that the unmade bed is a real thing and not a photo or a picture of an unmade bed.
You might think 'my little sister could do that' when you see some piece of art in a gallery but then you've got to ask yourself 'so why is this here and why isn't my sisters dawdles?' I can assure you it's pretty fucking difficult to get something displayed in a gallery, so a moment's reflection (not this website's strongest suit) would make you ask 'why is this here then'?
I've seen Emin's unmade bed a couple of times and it's pretty shocking. It's not the bed of a normal person and in a way it's similar to the 'Ray's a laugh' photos of Richard Billingham. If you don't know those photos, Google them- they're photos of his alcoholic mum and dad's flat in a tower-block in the Midlands and they must have taken a lot of balls to show to the world. They show you family life situations you really don't want to see and I always feel a bit grubby looking at them.
'My bed' is like looking into the mind of someone with a serious mental-illness (which is exactly what it is) and she basically just got out of the bed she'd spent days in while she thought about suicide. There are overflowing ashtrays, cheap vodka bottles, condoms, shit and filth and a pair of her knickers with period blood and piss in them. Above all it repels you so much because it fucking stinks and smell is one of the strongest senses and one you can't really control. It's a lot more than just an unmade bed.
The nearest I've ever come to a bed like that in the outside world was my old mate Guy, the guitarist in my band, just before he jumped off the roof of the tower-block he lived in- so the bed resonates with me.
Art? Fuck knows- but it freaked the fuck out of me.
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northernammer
5:40 Wed Apr 4
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Chim... of course I'm not :-)
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EssexGaz
5:24 Wed Apr 4
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I haven't seen Tracey Emin's unmade bed, nor would I want to, but I have seen plenty of others. None of which I thought of as works of art.
I have seen a couple of Rembrandt's paintings, along with other Dutch Masters, and they are what I consider to be great works of art.
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chim chim cha boo
5:15 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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northernammer 4:19 Wed Apr 4
Come on mate- you're better than that, surely?
Okay then, on to WHO enemy number 1- Tracy Emin and her unmade bed.
Serious question: has anyone who seems to hate it and holds it up as the embodiment of what utter shit modern art is actually been to see it?
Sometimes it seems as though this site (which I love) is the bleakest place in the world. Sometimes it appears that you cunts don't like ANYTHING. Obviously some of you will laugh at that but it's the truth.
It's a little known fact that Captain Lawrence Oates used to post on here as 'Penguin botherer'. He posted from time to time how he was getting on with trudging to the South Pole with Scotty and the boys: you know 'fucking hell Fenton- you said it was going to be sunny but I'm freezing my bollocks off here' and 'I had a great stream of the Peterborough game until this poxy fucking laptop turned into a block of ice'. Some smug cunt then posted 'get a Mac'. Someone who'll remain nameless told him they'd taken the wrong kit and told him he was a cunt for not listening when he said 'black Labs, labs and labs again'.
It turns out that his last reported words were not actually 'I'm going to collect rock samples- I may be some time' but 'fucking steaming pile of cunt- I'm off to top myself'. When they looked at his phone he was on a thread started by Nicey that Texas Iron had contributed to after a 1-1 draw.
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Saul Bollox
4:41 Wed Apr 4
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Tony Hart's the best of all time
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gph
4:39 Wed Apr 4
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Rolf to win, but then to end up bisected in a tank.
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WHU(Exeter)
4:29 Wed Apr 4
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To be fair, Cheeta* has knocked some good stuff out in his time. Lot of Americans pay good money for it.
*The fraud Cheeta, not the original Tarzan one.
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northernammer
4:19 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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8:54 Tue Apr 3
'Hirst is without a doubt a charlatan'?
It would appear Tate modern disagree with you considering they are about to exhibit Hurst's first major retrospective...
they also exhibited an unmade bed, a pile of bricks , and proclaimed a daub done by a chimp as a lost Jackson Pollock.
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northernammer
4:16 Wed Apr 4
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boney M being Hirst and Floyd being Rolf
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13 Brentford Rd
3:28 Wed Apr 4
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Bit like comparing Boney M with Pink Floyd, so therefore you can't!
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yngwies Cat
3:08 Wed Apr 4
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Went to see Rolf years ago, he was playing Buttons in Cinderalla at Richmond theatre.
A bit into the show, he appears on stage with his paints and starts his routine. Had only just slapped a bit of colour on the paper when he cried his immortal lines.
'Can you guess what it is yet?'
At which point at little voice in the front replied
'It's an Elephent!!'
Suitably stumped and bemused Rolf asked the little fella how he knew he was painting an Elephent?, at which point the lad replied
' saw the show yesterday!!'
Guess you would have had to been there. Fuckin funny though.
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torino hammer
11:10 Wed Apr 4
Re: Damien Hirst v Rolf Harris
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Funny coincidence but I was reliably told last night that in his his peak TV period Rolf had the benefit of hidden dots to join up when he did those TV paintings.......
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