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jct 2:04 Sun Apr 15
Football dad - advice needed!

I need the wisdom of WHO about how to deal with this utter cretin of a man.

I coach an U8s kids team in London and as a group they're pretty decent footballers but most of them are trouble-makers, from dodgy backgrounds so its often a struggle to teach them anything.

Anyway not too much of a problem as they're only 7/8 years old and the main thing for them is just to have fun, theyre too young to be in a proper competitve league and we just have friendlies against other teams.

This morning be got thrashed 6 nil by a team because the opposition had to play a team that was 80% older kids - after the match one of our parents comes over complaining about a handball i didn't give ( i was the ref)

He then proceeded to tell me about how the kids needed to be taught how to play positions better and how they needed set postions (we swap them around, so no-ones always in defence) --- he then went onto say how talented his kid was and how he is seriously thinking of taking him to another team because we're not coaching them well enough, he was really aggressive and it took a lot from me not tell him to fck off in front of the kids.

Anyone who coaches kids that age knows that you can't over-coach them and most importantly that its just for fun!

If this guy comes back next week with his kid should i just tell him to get lost? His kid's attitude is really good funnily enough and i don't want to let him down but i don't think i could talk to this no-nothing prick again...

Also his kid is the best player, thats another factor...he's not amazing (and did f all in the match) but its another consideration..

Thanks for any advice

welwynwestham 7:05 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Tell him you're running the team the west ham way. Its all about how you play and not about the result.
Stay positive with the players and build a team. they will keep coming back to play no matter what the results.
Had experience of this myself, four years on we have many of the same players playing some great football.
And shouting at Kids football is no longer allowed so if he starts tell him to Fck off haha

Briano 5:04 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Fa code of Conductfor parents

http://www.thefa.com/Leagues/Respect/CodesofConduct/~/media/Files/PDF/Leagues/Respect/Codes_of_Conduct_2009-10/RespectCodes_SpectatorsPntsCrs.ashx/RespectCodes_SpectatorsPntsCrs.pdf

Irish Hammer 4:57 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

* passes potato to jack

hammerintheorient 4:51 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

What JCT says, too

I want to recommend the importance of a wall or walled area to helping the development of young players and the confidence and technical ability of young players

hammerintheorient 4:48 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

The FA do a parents' course, they should all be forced to watch that if you ask me!

My mate who runs a Brazilian Soccer Schools franchise printed off a code of conduct for parents and distributed it early on. I think that's one thing they ought to do so that the parents know up from there'll be no malarky!

I agree with the plaudits, it is a difficult group to teach, I would recommend 'techniquex3', eg competitive toetaps, that kind of thing. They are unable at that age to appreciate the insight and communications. Yes, fun is the main thing, well done

JACK1 3:50 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

sorry see that Irish Hammer already suggested that .

* does 10 hail mary's on the grounds of agreeing with an Irishman *

JACK1 3:47 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Why don't you invite him to help you in the coaching !

Joke Whole 3:06 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

At times like this you need to remember the "Village" variation of some sound WHO advice - In particular the "Village People" variation:

It's fun to give him a C....I....T..B,
It's fun to give him a C....I....T..B,

Basildon Bob 2:53 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

even at that age it`s difficult,i go and watch my nephew (8) and there are three players in the team who are much better than the rest so they just pass it to each other and screw the rest


my nephew ends up going in goal so he can have a touch and the other 3 pick their noses


it`s dog eat dog,even at that age

jct 2:46 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Basildon Bob

No disrespect but more successful countries that produce technical players do so because they don't have the same must-win mentality as us.

We haven't got any Messis because we're only interested in winning straight away and so pick more physically developed kids ahead of players that could develop over time

jct 2:42 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Really appreciate all of what's been said so far, thankyou.

1964

My intention was to make them play in set positions next when we're in a regular league, the problem is certain parents so 'my kid could do well up front' and its not something i can argue with until he's been given a go there. --- Maybe my mistake was listening to the parents at all...?

Also just to doubly stress its not that i dont want them to win matches, last time we played this team we beat them. This time we lost because the oppo were much bigger - 2 of our players inc. th keeper are actually U7s. Big gap between 7 and 9 year olds.

Aberdeen Iron 2:40 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Sounds like the kind of parent who will be in your ear everytime you lose.

If you want to keep the kid then tell the old man how it is, you make the decisions for the team and hopefully all the boys will progress (in time), win or lose so him kicking off at you wont change how you coach the team. Be polite and if he still aint happy then wish him the best of luck elsewhere.

Briano 2:32 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

This sort of bloke will not be happy wherever he goes so tell him you are the manager, you make the decisions and if he don't like it tell him to do one.

I managed a team from u7's to u11's - of the 10 players 5 ended up in academies. The weakest boys' dad was a completely irrational control freak who was convinced his lad was the next Beckham. I ignored him until he went loopy in front of the kids and other parents. It was then unanimously decided that he should go.

Irish Hammer 2:30 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

You could invite him to help in the coaching seeing as he wants to ensure his child is getting the best attention.

I'm sure he is prepared to give up 2 nights of his own time each week for free, and drive the kids to matches.

1964 2:26 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

For what it's worth mate.

I managed a team of kids from U10s to U17s for eight years, took some lads right through. After eight years I'd had enough but one or two of those lads went on to play semi-pro.

At u10 or even younger at your u8 it is virtually impossible to coach kids where your playing at most weekly games and you see them only for maybe an hour or two at training during the week.

I didn't try to teach them anything at that age but what I did do was organise them. I don't think it's good to change then around every week. I tried to identify particular players best positions and then fit them in to make a team.

Get them to games, encourage them and organise into the best unit with what you have. I wasn't qualified to coach anyway.

It did work and it's suprising how kids do not always want to be "the stricker". We had a fair degree of sucess over 8 years winning cups and always near the top of the league.

As for parents - I had plenty of that both praise and critics and some abuse. Tell them your trying to give an opportunity for the kids to play and have fun. If they think their kid is the bees knees that's fine, if he's any good you'll lose him anyway when pro clubs come snooping. I l;ost 2 to Chelsea/Charlton like that. Otherwise ignore the parents and carry on what's best for all. If they don't like it they will FO and you will be better with parents that support you.

Basildon Bob 2:26 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

I make him right,need to instill a winning mentality early like other more successful countries do

fordstar 2:23 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Best way to deal with people like this is to tell them you teach and play how you want and if he does not agree with it he should take his boy elsewhere.



This will not be the only time this happens as you cannot please everyone, btw well done for teaching that age group it is a fucking nightmare.

JLAP 2:19 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Go to hand the dad your whistle and as he goes to take it pull it away and wrap it around his neck, then whisper in his ear to fucking leave the football stuff to you..

HTH

I.want.that.one 2:11 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

My advice would, get used to it.

North Bank 2:08 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Just tell the dad how it is, it's highly unlikely that none of them will make it professionally so the important thing is that they enjoy it, if that's not good enough for him and he feels the need to live out his dream through his kid, then maybe it's best he takes his boy to another club.

this bloke could become a pain in the arse over the coming years

straightuplazy 2:07 Sun Apr 15
Re: Football dad - advice needed!

Tell him to stop embarrassing himself infront of his 8 year old son.

OR

You could get someone to drill (DRILL) a ball at him and make it look like an accident?

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