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les marteaux 7:44 Sat Aug 30
New Limerick Thread
Same as before

The football we play to be blunt
Is to most West Ham fans an affront

Replies - Newest Posts First (Show In Chronological Order)

Kaiser Zoso 9:51 Thu Jan 18
Re: New Limerick Thread
Here was a fake Turk called Nick
Who got on everyone’s wick
His bird was a model
He thought it’s a doddle
But he just makes everyone sick

HairyHammer 9:43 Thu Jan 18
Re: New Limerick Thread
At an inopportune time I farted
And couldn't stop once I had started
An embarrassing bane
I was on a packed train
Next stop rudely off I was carted.

An eye for an eye screamed a tramp
When on his mates groin he did stamp

Far East Hammer 5:50 Thu Jan 18
Re: New Limerick Thread
A man trav'lling the DLR
Dropped a huge turd in the front car
An ungodly sight
Quite late at night
And with a stench carrying far

At an inopportune time I farted
And couldn't stop once I had started

arsene york-hunt 3:48 Thu Jan 18
Re: New Limerick Thread
A doctor who lied for the Trump
Said he's fitter than Forrest Gump,
He did it in hope,
Of a brown envelope,
The sum to be all in one lump.

A man trav'lling the DLR
Dropped a huge turd in the front car

HairyHammer 12:43 Thu Jan 18
Re: New Limerick Thread
I used to turn left on the plane.
I don't think I'll do it again.
The pilots go mental
As they want to fly central
So now I will hijack a train.

A doctor who lied for the Trump
Said he's even fitter than Forrest Gump

Mike Oxsaw 10:37 Wed Jan 17
Re: New Limerick Thread
A lady from the Shetland isles
Tried a new cure for her piles
A serious go,
On a massive dildo;
The squelching could be heard for miles.

I used to turn left on the plane.
I don't think I'll do it again.

Helmut Shown 10:19 Wed Jan 17
Re: New Limerick Thread
Walking in from Hackney Wick,
I saw something that made me sick.
In a public place
She pissed on his face
And he cleaned her off with a lick

A lady from the Shetland isles
Tried a new cure for her piles

arsene york-hunt 6:06 Wed Jan 17
Re: New Limerick Thread
Now. Can we advance in the cup?
Or will the club sell us a pup?
Based on tonight's show
You'd have to say no,
They only care about staying up.

Walking in from Hackney Wick,
I saw something that made me sick.

Mike Oxsaw 9:19 Tue Jan 16
Re: New Limerick Thread
I can not make any sense of it,
When playing shit teams we play shit
As long as we play
The old West Ham way
The fans really don't mind a bit

Now. Can we advance in the cup?
Or will the club sell us a pup?

arsene york-hunt 4:05 Sat Jan 13
Re: New Limerick Thread

I can not make any sense of it,
When playing shit teams we play shit

arsene york-hunt 4:00 Sat Jan 13
Re: New Limerick Thread
A milf eyed a donkey's big shlong
Her mind in place oh so wrong,
Playing Animal Farm
Now caused her alarm,
She had fear while removing her thong.

I can not make any sense of it,
When playing shit teams and we play shit

HairyHammer 10:38 Sat Jan 13
Re: New Limerick Thread
Her mind in a place oh so wrong

HairyHammer 4:16 Sat Jan 13
Re: New Limerick Thread
A working girl from San Diago
Suffered quite a bit from Lumbago
So she;d just wank and suck
As No way she could fuck
And for extras made dildo's from playdough.

A milf eyed a donkey's big shlong
Her mind in place oh so wrong

arsene york-hunt 3:29 Sat Jan 13
Re: New Limerick Thread
This transfer they won't be too tight
The best of the best in their sight.
If you think that my friend,
You're a total bell end,
In bullshit, I think, you delight.

A working girl from San Diago
Suffered quite a bit from Lumbago

HairyHammer 2:34 Sat Jan 13
Re: New Limerick Thread
A prostitute in Pattaya,
Was picked up by a bricklayer.
She had big hairy thighs
And a touch strong and wise
But her Cock meant no go for this player.

This transfer they won't be too tight
The best of the best in their sight.

arsene york-hunt 9:28 Fri Jan 12
Re: New Limerick Thread
You know when Trump's talking shit
His lips are moving a bit
A very strange man,
Daft hair and fake tan,
He looks quite a bit of a tit.

A prostitute in Pattaya,
Was picked up by a bricklayer.

Helmut Shown 10:31 Fri Jan 12
Re: New Limerick Thread
Our owner loves the sound of his voice.
From he's posh mansion close to Theydon Bois
But his teenage son Jack
Tweets a load of old cack
He should be told to go back to his toys

You know when Trump's talking shit
His lips are moving a bit

jfk 4:33 Fri Jan 12
Re: New Limerick Thread
Our owners a dwarf and a half jew.
Produced rude things for me and for you.
Made their sons oh so rich whilst paying a bitch.
A good run of wins overdue.

Out owner loves the sound of his voice.
From he's posh mansion close to Theydon Bois

arsene york-hunt 3:59 Fri Jan 12
Re: New Limerick Thread
One owner is an old duffer,
The other a lying old bluffer,
They've both made their choices
And come in Rolls Royces
We walk from Stratford, it's tougher.

Our owners a dwarf and a half jew.
Produced rude things for me and for you

Hermit Road 1:03 Fri Jan 12
Re: New Limerick Thread
Our owners resemble the devil,
With all of their talk of "Next Level".
No wonder we’re glum,
We’re taken for dumb,
While in profits from us they do revel.

One owner is an old duffer,
The other a lying old bluffer,

Mike Oxsaw 12:53 Fri Jan 12
Re: New Limerick Thread
The window is open hooray
But who are we buying today?
No purchase or loan?
Let's all have a moan
And then we can go on our way.

Our owners resemble the devil,
With all of their talk of "Next Level".

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