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Mad Dog 6:13 Wed Aug 12
THE joke threads (part 5)
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chim chim cha boo 6:26 Fri Dec 15
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
claret on my shirt 3:03 Thu Dec 14

I've always thought it's cruel to give starving, hungry homeless people soup.

Everyone knows soup is a starter.

Aalborg Hammer 5:32 Fri Dec 15
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Bloke goes into a Fish and chip shop with a cod under his arm.
He says "Do you sell fishcakes??"
"Yes,we do" says the bloke
"Oh good,it's his birthday"

claret on my shirt 3:03 Thu Dec 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
I've been trying to do my part this Christmas and volunteer at a soup kitchen to help feed the homeless.

They don't seem very grateful though, especially when it's time for them leave at night and I hustle them out saying, "Come on, some of us have homes to go to."

claret on my shirt 3:02 Thu Dec 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
My wife said I needed to get more in touch with my feminine side...

So I crashed the car, burnt the dinner and completely ignored her all night for no fucking reason...

claret on my shirt 3:01 Thu Dec 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
My wife gets really annoyed when I use the word 'cunt.'
I suppose she has a point.
I should really make an effort to learn her mother's real name...

Mirkwood 9:42 Wed Dec 13
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Made me chuckle that one...lol

Queens Fish Bar 9:06 Wed Dec 13
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
I mer a girl at a party on Saturday.

I said "you remind me of my little toe"

She said "what small and cute?"

I said "No, its because I will bang you on the table when I'm pissed"

Aalborg Hammer 8:34 Tue Dec 12
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
.....and then, God created the orgasm , so women can moan even when they're happy..

Coffee 4:00 Sun Dec 10
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Queens Fish Bar 3:56 Sun Dec 10

Ha ha ha!

Queens Fish Bar 3:56 Sun Dec 10
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
A young girl walks into a supermarket and on her way round she sees the bloke who she copped off with last night.

He was stacking washing powder boxes on the shelves.

"You lying toad" she yells "last night you told me you were a stunt pilot"

"No" he says "I told you I was a member of the Ariel display team"

penners28 10:31 Thu Dec 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
the coming of gary 5:10 Tue Dec 5

you missed the rest of the joke off...they follow 6 people called herb and the 5 spice girls.

11 herbs and spices...

Swiss. 10:20 Thu Dec 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Aalborg

Always a good joke.

Aalborg Hammer 8:44 Thu Dec 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
There's a Welsh sheep farmer taking his driving test. The examiner says "Can you make a U-Turn?" "I'll make her eyes water ,if I go in dry"

the coming of gary 5:10 Tue Dec 5
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
not strictly a joke , but i saw the @KFC official twitter account only follows 11 people... subtle humour
.

Willtell 6:45 Wed Nov 29
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
You're welcome E12. COYI tonight...

E12Hammer 5:18 Wed Nov 29
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
My first WHO parody. Thank you. Made my day that.

Willtell 5:14 Wed Nov 29
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
E12Hammer went to the hardware store and said "I'd like to buy some nails".

The storekeeper asked "How long do you want them?".

E12Hammer said, "Well, I'd like to keep them really."

Willtell 5:05 Wed Nov 29
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Why two or was that a joke too?

E12Hammer 5:05 Wed Nov 29
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Fucking hell Willtell, who made you the laughter police.

I got it, I chuckled. Job done.

Chip Shop Charlie 5:03 Wed Nov 29
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
mtchammer 4:01 Wed Nov 29
I liked it two

Willtell 4:59 Wed Nov 29
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Easily pleased obviously but never mind, just try a little harder next time mtc....

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