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Q: 2017/18 The RealWestHamFans March on March 10th
a. I'll be there, it's time for action now enough is enough
53%
  
b. Not for me, I'll see you all at the Stadium
14%
  
c. A bit difficult for me as I'll be on my stream with a cup of rosie
25%
  
d. What march
8%
  



Mad Dog 6:13 Wed Aug 12
THE joke threads (part 5)
Usual rules apply

Replies - Newest Posts First (Show In Chronological Order)

Helmut Shown 12:06 Tue Feb 20
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Two young boys talking to each other, one says:
"what's your biggest ambition?"
The other replies:
" I want a cock as big as my brothers so I can hold it with four fingers when I piss.
"Well that's not much of an ambition" replies the other" I can hold my cock with four fingers when I piss"
"Yes" exclaims the other one "but you piss on the last two fingers"

claret on my shirt 1:58 Mon Feb 19
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
After Pards said Gareth Barry and Johnny Evans will never play for the club again after stealing a taxi outside of a fast food restaurant in Barcelona earlier in the week, 8 other West Brom players have admitted to being in the back of the taxi!

riosleftsock 9:04 Sun Feb 18
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Jimmy Savile, Gary Glitter and Brendon Cox walk into a bar in Ireland.
The landlord says "not yewtree again".

The Stoat 6:31 Fri Feb 16
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Ive been trying to get my girlfriend to stimulate me sexually with her keyring but she keeps fobbing me off.

BillyBondsBirthday 11:24 Wed Feb 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Bloke goes into a florists and says he wants a big Valentines bouquet for his wife.

Florist says, are you looking for anything in particular?

Bloke says, well ideally a blow job.

jfk 11:03 Wed Feb 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Robbie Williams, Kylie and Elton are walking in London when Kylie stumbles and gets her head wedged between railings. Quick as a flash Robbie pulls up her skirt, knickers down and start shagging her. Robbie says to Elton- your go next. Then Elton starts crying. What’s up asks Robbie. Elton says “my head won’t fit between the railings!

Queens Fish Bar 9:18 Wed Feb 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Roses are red
Violets are twisted
Bend over now
You're about to get fisted.

Mad Dog 3:27 Wed Feb 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Wife just said that 3 of the girls had bouquets of flowers delivered to their office. "They're gorgeous" she said.

"That's probably why they got flowers then" I replied

joyo 2:41 Wed Feb 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Asked the Mrs what she wants for Valentine's. She said "I'll give you a clue, an Ex England goalie"
She's expecting Flowers. She's getting Seaman.

Aalborg Hammer 8:44 Wed Feb 14
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
The Hobbit stars Martin Freeman and Andy Serkis are in the new movie “Black Panther” as the Tolkien white guys.

Mirkwood 6:16 Mon Feb 12
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
For just £3.00 a month you can help us reduce poverty by sponsoring a local prostitute in Haiti.

Jarza 4:06 Wed Feb 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Alborg...

I heard this
"That's a picture of me when I played for Juventus"
as
"That's a picture of me when I was Andy Carroll, playing for Newcaste"

lars 12:51 Wed Feb 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
A friend has just spent £95 plus VAT on a penis enlarger.

Buggers sent him a magnifying glass.

The only instructions said, "Do not use in sunlight!

Aalborg Hammer 12:38 Wed Feb 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Bloke comes home for work and asks the wife if she'd like to play a sex game. He says "I've got flavoured condoms and you have to guess the flavour" "OK" she says. "Cheese and Onion??"

"Wait a minute,I haven't put one on yet!!"

Willtell 11:54 Wed Feb 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
Keep to the thread title and only post jokes on here Aalborg lol?

Aalborg Hammer 10:44 Wed Feb 7
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
The horse and the donkey are best mates .One day the donkey's round the horses' stable and there's a picture on the wall of the
horse winning the Grand National.
The donkey's very impressed but feels he has to do something to impress the horse the next time he comes round.
The donkey buys a picture of a zebra and puts it up in his shed...
The next time the horse comes round the donkey says "That's a picture of me when I played for Juventus"

Westside 1:51 Fri Feb 2
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
My wife says I'm unromantic. I dispute that.

Just a couple of weeks ago, I went up to her, put my arms around her and spoke gently into her ear

" I really need to tell you something, that I don't tell you often enough."

"Aah, she says softly. What's that?"

"West Ham won away from home," I said.

ted fenton 1:30 Fri Feb 2
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
A kid gave his teacher a blank piece of paper.
Teacher: What is this?
Kid: It's a drawing of a cow eating grass.
Teacher: (looked at the paper) Where's the grass?
Kid: The cow ate all of it.
...Teacher: (looked at the paper again)Then, where's the cow?
Kid: It left because there was no more grass.

Aalborg Hammer 3:43 Thu Feb 1
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
I was in a pub last Saturday night, when this really large and brutally ugly woman came up to me, squeezed my bum and said, "Give me your number, sexy."

I replied "Have you got a pen?"

She smiled and said "Yes."

I said, "Well you better get back to it, before the farmer realises you're missing."

Mike Oxsaw 4:15 Wed Jan 31
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
There's something quite strange about my phone. The "3" button's fallen off. I can't put my finger on it.

ted fenton 1:13 Wed Jan 31
Re: THE joke threads (part 5)
My old Mum used to say, "Always give your food a rinse before you eat it."
Lovely woman, terrible sandwiches.

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