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Coffee 9:15 Sat Sep 15
Saturday football
We must wait another day for the weekend’s big game, but there are prospects of entertainment this afternoon. Not least, possibly, from the testing of the video assistant referee at all the 3.00pm kick-offs.

TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR vs LIVERPOOL (1230 ko)
A corker to start the weekend’s top division fixtures. Liverpool defend a 100 percent record that’s fully deserved. Spurs, meanwhile, have had a fortnight to reflect on defeat at Watford, another side with a perfect record. The home team will be without the influence and drive of injured goalkeeper, Hugo Lloris. In fact, Lloris won’t be doing much driving of any kind in the foreseeable future, and may thus be open to Scouse interest in his redundant Porsche’s spare parts. Away win.

BOURNEMOUTH vs LEICESTER CITY
Both sides come into this with confidence and expectations high. Bournemouth have made their best start yet to a Premier League season, while the Foxes have Jamie Vardy back after a three-game sojourn. On paper, which admittedly has multiple uses, this is a perfect match of equals and should be an intriguing watch. Draw.

CHELSEA vs CARDIFF CITY
Any bus parking qualifications that Colin may have will come in handy today. This is far from a battle of equals and the only real question concerns how many Chelsea will score. Home win.

HUDDERSFIELD TOWN vs CRYSTAL PALACE
Lest we forget, this time last season Palace were still four games away from recording their first win and even scoring their first goal. Their start to this season hasn’t exactly been rocket-propelled either and they’re just one point above their hosts at the start of play. They’ll be without Christian Benteke this afternoon, while Cheikh Kouyate may start. Although still early in the campaign, this is a vital game that both sides will want to take something from. Home win.

MANCHESTER CITY vs FULHAM
You have to admire the Fulham boss’s continued emphasis on attack. Less admirable is his side’s defensive record, which will receive its fiercest test to date this afternoon. Only two teams, of which Huddersfield is one, have conceded more goals so far this season. They will be grateful for the continued absence of Kevin de Bruyne, but that may prove little more than minor relief against a team brimming with top talent and hungry for consecutive league titles. Home win.

NEWCASTLE UNITED vs ARSENAL
The smart money’s on Arsenal, right? Or is it? Arsenal’s points this season have come from just two games – victories against Cardiff and the side currently occupying bottom position. They’ve lost against Chelsea and Man City. A loyal barcode may take some encouragement from that, despite their only point to date coming from a goalless encounter at Cardiff. It’s a tough one to call, the more so because of a friendly old rivalry between the managers, los dos amigos. Draw.

WATFORD vs MANCHESTER UNITED (1730 ko)
Who’s favourite – the team with home advantage and a 100 percent record or the one with a negative goal difference and currently sitting in 10th spot with six points? Rashford’s out for United, whose domestic goings on have started to resemble an episode of The Glums. In marked contrast to Watford, who are enjoying Happy Days under Javi Garcia. The Fonz plays Ron and Eff. Draw.

Replies - Newest Posts First (Show In Chronological Order)

Westham67 6:27 Sun Sep 16
Re: Saturday football
Every team I saw on MOTD this morning were sharper , better organised and ran more than we do.

I hope we get something today but papering over cracks again if we do.

Westham67 3:02 Sun Sep 16
Re: Saturday football
Yes I would like to think we will uproot trees for a result not sure that is to MPs agenda though

wanstead_hammer 2:50 Sun Sep 16
Re: Saturday football
67

Sod that, sounds a bit too close for comfort. Still, it's moving away towards the proper tiddlys now, i read.
(And we moan here if we get a few hours drizzle!)

The team need to start pulling up a few trees now, starting at Everton.

Westham67 2:06 Sun Sep 16
Re: Saturday football
wanstead_hammer 4:58 Sat Sep 15

We live out in the sticks and our house or a nearby tree got struck by lightening last night massive flash ,bang and the electric tripped out

I've been in a few full on Typhoons in Taiwan we loved them because we got 3 days off work. No fun for people living near the coast or shed like houses

wanstead_hammer 12:33 Sun Sep 16
Re: Saturday football
Times I've shouted that out and he plays a blinder.
Fuckin midget.

theaxeman 12:28 Sun Sep 16
Re: Saturday football
What a player Hazard is the little chelsea cunt

Sven Roeder 7:45 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
I think they have given yellow tshirts to alternate sections
It was either that or happy clappers I s'pose

I was wrong its not quite as dark pink as taramasalata..
More 'English tourist on Bondi Beach'

pdbis 7:39 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
That Manchester United kit if up there with the shit colour one Coventry had many years ago. Are you only allowed in certain sections of Vicarage Road if you are wearing the home strip?

angryprumphs 7:36 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
geoffpikey 6:53 Sat Sep 15

Thinking about it, that is something that happens to us a lot..... shit state of affairs when other teams results give you more cause for hope than your own.

The West Ham way......

geoffpikey 7:35 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
No. It's pink. In "honour" of The Football Pink MEN.

Although, put like that, the Society for Not Gammon Lawyers will probably blacklist me. Or, not blacklist but give a yellow card. Well, not that either, as the Asian Lawyers may get involved. Either way, this is trouble. Anyway. It's "pink"

El Scorchio 7:27 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Horrible kit. Looks like someone left a red sock in when they washed it.

ragingbull 7:25 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Palace as good as down without zaha.

Sven Roeder 7:20 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Man Utd appearing at Watford in TARAMASALATA shirts and WHITE shorts

camel-with-3-humps 7:07 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Looking at what’s going on, it’s going to be us, Cardiff, Newcastle, Huddersfield, Fulham fighting relegation.

When you have a senile moron in charge who plays 4-4-2 with Nobes and Wilshire, you are outstanding relegation material.

If we sack the old fraud, we might survive.

theaxeman 7:02 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
SAVE OUR SEASON! OUR SEASON STARTS HERE!

Mart O 6:56 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Sven Roeder 6:36 Sat Sep 15

"A win tomorrow could take us to 16th"

So, despite us being UTTER FUCKING SHIT, we're actually not necessarily a lot worse than the likes of Fulham, Newcastle, Cardiff and Huddersfield ?

Slim pickings, I know, lads, but the fight to stay up starts HERE.

geoffpikey 6:53 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
We've improved our lot again by NOT playing. We're brilliant at that.

Sven Roeder 6:36 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Took my Fantasy football armband off The Useless Kane last week and gave it to Edin Hazard.
Back of the net (x3)

A win tomorrow could take us to 16th

terry-h 6:22 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Lampard has just been sent off from the Derby County dugout at Rotherham.
Rotherham lead 1-0 so far.

This is definitely the best news of the day, as I don't particularly like junior.

Keep dreaming 6:18 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
We still haven't conceded. =)

Northern Sold 5:42 Sat Sep 15
Re: Saturday football
Some goal Zaha scored.... out of absolute nothing

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