West Ham Online

"Been through bad time lately with suffering with this. Dark thoughts as well. I know some posters on here suffer with this. Anyone come through the other side of this shit?

"A number of posters have been yellow carded and told to stay off this thread unless they have anything constructive to add.This is a thread that has been very useful to so many, for any other posters with scores to settle, argue on another thread. This thread is sacrosant.Thank you"

"Block 9:29 Wed Jan 15 Re: Anxiety/depression however something I read was that if you allow the thoughts to consume you and face them head on, for you to realise they aren't all that bad will help you overcome depression/anxiety. I'm trying to get my head around how that works if somebody is so low they are considering putting an end to it all."

"Buster 10:10 Wed Jan 15 It helps if you get on with the people you work with which I do, thankfully. Bang on though, nothing worse than working with cunts you dislike."

"I've been field based for over 25 years now. I have contact with people but in short, manageable bursts with long periods on my own which is perfect. I actually dread the prospect of ever having to work in an office or similar now. I get stir crazy if I'm on a course and am stuck in the same place for any more than a day or two."

"Buster - Fair dues, I suppose there is that side to it. You really don't miss any company or 'banter' at all?"

"I work from home permanently now and I fucking love it. Nothing worse than having to spend 40 hours a week with people you’d otherwise not give a fuck about if you didn’t have to work with them, listening to stories about their kids and the like."

"Bolt - The old saying 'laughter is the best medicine' really is bang on the money. Having a laugh, sharing a joke can have a huge difference on your day and mood, etc. 'A day without laughter is a day wasted' - Charlie S. Chaplin"

"Shutting yourself away i.e working from home CAN be a bad thing, depending on the person. I couldn't do it, I love being around people and having a laugh, when I'm on my own I tend to go into a dark hole and bad thoughts tend to take over, however something I read was that if you allow the thoughts to consume you and face them head on, for you to realise they aren't all that bad will help you overcome depression/anxiety."

"Shutting yourself away i.e working from home CAN be a bad thing, depending on the person. I couldn't do it, I love being around people and having a laugh, when I'm on my own I tend to go into a dark hole and bad thoughts tend to take over, however something I read was that if you allow the thoughts to consume you and face them head on, for you to realise they aren't all that bad will help you overcome depression/anxiety."

"Tomshardware - yes a few times, one particularly bad about 4 years ago. Don’t be afraid to get some help, you may find that difficult to do/admit but when you’re in a bad way you aren’t thinking rationally and need people to steer you in the right direction"

"Mike Oxsaw 8:51 Wed Jan 15 Exactly. It should be an option more easily available. I also work with a second employer with kids with SEN but since I've been working 5 days a week I knocked it on the head because I am so exhausted. However with a 4 day week I am hoping I can get back to the odd evening or weekend session as well as they are sessions of anything from 2 hours to 8 hours. A few of those and I hope I can make up a bit of the financial shortfall but without having to go in all day. It's incredible how mum's illness affects my mind as well. I used to ring her a lot and just chat and have a moan if needed about work, life et6c but now she isn't at the end of the phone and with no conversation skills you don't have anyone family wise to talk to."

I actually think work from home days can help. Sometimes I want to be left alone.

"zico 8:31 Wed Jan 15 Actually. working from home at least one day a week should be an option chased up by everyone with an office job. You can still put the hours in, but, being at home frees you up to do a lot of the little tasks that get continually put off, simply because there's not enough time. Whereas you might spent time going to the office kitchen for a cuppa, you can do so at home and, at the same time, stick a wash on, or part-prepare a meal while the kettle's boiling. Just freeing up a few minutes here & there can bring a great relief."

"I've never suffered and been lucky but it's strange how things can creep up on you. Since mum was diagnosed with Dementia and placed in care things have been tough. I live alone so as well as a newish job I've been running two peoples lives and it's knocked me for six mentally and physically. You have letters, emails, phone calls that you have to chase up but by the time I am home all those you need to contact have left as well and a lot aren't there weekends and I have no-one to allocate to. I plucked up the courage to ask work if I could move from 5 days to 4, basically it being an Admin Day and opportunity to visit mum in the morning when things tend to be slightly better and it seems work are agreeing, having a meeting today to thrash out the finer points, and it's already been a weight off my shoulders. Obviously financially it won't be an option for everyone, not even sure if it will be for me, but if I can just move all the personal affairs to the side until either a Monday or Friday off it will be a weight off my mind. Hopefully!!!!"

"best advice for people who feel they're not affected by depression/anxiety check on your mates and family on the reg ALL of them - someone will thank you for it call em, pop round un invited, ask em how they're doing and don't talk about your own poxy boring happy self."

"Zeb.. talking therapies for me, were utterly useless. I went through the early stages of the process, talking to someone over the phone, getting into the queue for a psychologist etc. Then suddenly one day I get a call asking if I can make this certain appointment, told them that I couldn't make it due to work commitment, then bam letter through the door saying I had been discharged from the programme. Trust me when I say that was very very nearly the tipping point. I was pushed to go by family members, in the end gave in and asked for the help from them and had that door slammed in my face. Hope it goes well for you though and you don't get the same treatment as me."

Going through this right now. It just creeps up on you and jumps out at the most unexpected times for no reason at all. Have had dark thoughts but won't give in because: a. My son b. I know it will pass; it always does. Have been waiting for three months for the first talking therapy appointment. Fuck know what have might have happened to those in a worse position than me. Can't wait for Spring

After8 that's the HIV medication

I think my main thing is knowing that I'm not going mad and my feelings have a reason behind them. I can get angry very quickly. I've worked on that a lot. I also can get anxious for no real reason. I have to keep telling myself that that is ok and I shouldn't be hard on myself.

Just don’t top yourself you might live to regret that decision.

"I think many have lost the ability to differentiate ""need to know"" from ""nice to know"", and, as such, soak up anything and everything out of a fear of ""missing out"" or not being amongst ""the first to know"" something - anything. To be honest, what the fuck does it matter if you find out we've busted our transfer budget a day after everybody else? How does that ""seriously fuck up"" your life?"

OK i'm back now .. as I was saying . I wouldn't top myself as if I am suffering I want everyone else to be suffering with me.

"bruuuno 7:35 Tue Jan 14 ""Basically the world has changed faster than our brains have evolved. We are now bombarded with too much stimulus and information"". -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was told a while ago, (and I have no reason not to believe it), that we are now exposed to roughly the same amount of information every year, as our grandparents were in their entire lifetime."

I'm not a slave to my phone..hold on I got to take this....

"bruuuno 7:35 Tue Jan 14 Virtually EVERYBODY is now a slave to their smart-phone/laptop. The proof is disarmingly simple. Ask someone to switch all their connected devices OFF completely for 48 hours. Any ""Yeah, buts..."", for ANY reason will immediately show someone as a data (not information, data) addict. Note: I said CONNECTED devices. You can have a phone for emergency use only - and posting a ""Like"" on Facebook is NOT an emergency."

People think I am a depressed person but Im not.