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Odds: 
WHU: 4/1
Draw: 3/1
Spurs: 3/4

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Well in what could be the last one of these for a while, we head to catchily names 'Tottenham Hotspur Stadium' this weekend for a clash between two sides who are, on form, pretty much the shittest in the league.

Thomas Frank, a manager that very few West Ham fans would have turned their nose up at any time post-Moyes is almost universally derided in North London, where his transformational overhaul at Spurs has seen them continue to concede just as many chances as they create (something Ange also managed), but has seen the frequency of those chances drop off a cliff.  Pretty it isn't.

Meanwhile at the toilet bowl, the saga involving Lucas Paqueta's desire to return to Brazil having been royally fucked over by English football in general, has once again reared it's ugly head...in some ways a refreshing distraction from the plight the Club is in, but in others, just another example of the disarray we find ourselves in.  It's also given the chance for the Club's most 'Senior Source' to start up with his social media 'reveals' again via the usual suspects (Whetstone/Ex/Gonzo/et al).

Take your pick what you believe, but he's either training on his own, gone on strike, nursing a back injury, or ready to stick one up the Cockerels.  Regardless it looks like he's off to Brazil in the not too distant future (frankly, who can blame him) and we'll now doubt 'soften the blow' with the exciting announcement of Adama Traore (Sullivan will need to spend the Paqueta dosh just to keep the lad in baby oil).

So back to this game. It's their dull, low block drudgery up against out dull, low block drudgery.  Maybe the new first team coach Paco Jemez can inspure Nuno to unshackle the beast, with tales of his relegation-cheating escapades at Rayo Vallecano (well, until they succombed in 2016). I doubt it though.  What is almost universally certain however, is that Spurs only fit-to-start frontman Kolo Muani will break his Spurs duck this weekend. Lump on!

Predicted line-up:

I expect Paqueta at best to be on the bench despite Nuno's protestations, meaning the decision will have to come down to whether to start both strikers, or stick one of the young CDMs in and push Fernandes higher up the pitch.  I suspect the latter.  The other decision...stick with T-Rex after a close-to-competent Cup performance, or welcome back Flapping Fonzi for some more 'punch their lights out' action.  My guess...the latter.Predicted Score:

Well we have a bench full of negativity, a dug out lacking in adventure, and a team that barely limped past the might of QPR (in extra time no less).  They are drudgery personified.  But given our form predicting a 0:0 feels impossible.

Spurs 1 - 1 West Ham  (Kolo Muani, Soucek)

COYI

honky cat" wrote: ↑17 Jan 2026, 13:23 I know we can hardly point the finger but this match wasn't sold out for the home fans. In their lovely purpose built stadium. The premier league is too expensive and a bit boring now, maybe it's not just us.

Non-league is the future - I've been calling it for 20 years and now it's actually starting to come true!

wrong thread i know, but watching Manchester Derby and Man U look a team reborn under Carrick. What a difference the right manager makes. 

Hoping our new first team coach can instal a bit more attacking ideas with Nuno and an opinion when needed during the game 
Think this will be a tight match

I know we can hardly point the finger but this match wasn't sold out for the home fans. In their lovely purpose built stadium. The premier league is too expensive and a bit boring now, maybe it's not just us.

Even at our shittiest we usually dispatch the vermin, but I've zero faith in Nuno. 3-0

It’ll be a shit game. We’ll park the bus. But we can’t park the bus effectively, because our centre backs are atrocious. So we’ll concede a couple.

2-0 to Spurs, if I was to hazard a guess. Although I am reassuringly shit at predicting scorelines!

2-1 to the irons after Spurs reduced to 9 men.

It wouldn't be unlike us to beat Spurs when at our absolute worst but this season feels a lot grimmer than most.

It could either turn to shit for the likeable Tommy Frank or he'll manage to crack into a smile for those ungrateful twats.

1-2

Always variables in these games. Derby, two shit teams, who  knows? Taty can become a fans favourite with a winner today. 

Sorry if it offends you Sir Alf, you miserable old bugger, but I reckon we're going to sneak this one. However, sadly I agree with Vexed that it would be very West Ham to give us hope by winning this one, only to follow it up by going on a big losing streak. Ho hum.

Turn it in Alf, you miserable cսnt.

43% going for a win

Sir Alf" wrote: ↑16 Jan 2026, 17:36 The 5 people saying we will win need certifying asap and  quickly put into those jackets with very long arms that wrap around the back. 

We can only guess that its just the pure guessing of eternal optimists who would always say we win how unlikely it is. This weekend we will go down meekly just like we did at Wolves. A 3 or 4 goal loss without a doubt. We are a very poor squad and probably have the 2nd worse first 11 in the division. They are not great but will get a comfortable win possibly aided by VAR or ref early on but us crumbling over 90 mins. 




 

We was down a long time ago but lose this then Sullivan's goose is cooked.

Conor Gallagher sent off after 3 mins
Romero off after 10 mins for punching the ref
Tottenham 0 West Ham 3 
Bowen 3

Thomas Frank found weeping in the cheese room having eaten a 5 pound Stilton 

I've read through everyone's comments and we're still winning today
 

Agree with Mex. Going today with no expectations but as fans we are in this for the long haul. I understand and respect those who have found it possible to walk away, to stop following the results and who think of their relationship with the real West Ham as something that is past. But we are an extraordinary soap opera with countless ups and downs still to come. Plenty of laughs and good times ahead, especially on away days. I’m still in. 

Sir Alf when did the pessimists sad negative predictions become a reality check? I would say, and actually you in someways confirm it, that with our young midfield we have more strength and pace than we have had in quite a while. We also have 2 new forwards. Pablo really gets about and looks an excellent signing to me. Taty I am not so convinced about, but he does a reasonable job of being a target up front and well he did get that goal. All reasons to be positive as far as I am concerned.
Bring it on, lets see how it goes.

Two shit teams, shit boards, pissed of fans and VAR ..

What could go wrong .

I even couldn't  be arsed to make an attempt to source a ticket!!  Going shopping with the Mrs .

Thanks West Ham ...it's fuckin come to this .

1-1 with a red card 
 

Thats the reality check some of the optimists ( bless em ) beed Tomsdad.  

In the past , ive always seen a West Ham team capable of springing a surprise now and then. Not this one. We dont have 11 players good enough with strength and pace stlill a central issue but also we dont have a well managed or coached squad that can play at a level that compensates for its inadequacies. An inconvenient truth. 

This wont happen but Id give Magassa a forwsrd lying role and use his strength to defend from the front and make runs with the ball Vierra style as he surpridingly did well a few times against Fulham.  He’s positionally less risky there and him and Potts too similar to be lying deep and actually Fernandes is quicker and can snap into tackles and besides got to try something different. Soucek is just too slow. Shame we cant just bring him on for defending corners and set pieces then take him off again

Summerville is at least an option from the bench and typically better against tiring teams

But I bet Mavro is injured. So all pointless as Kilman plays we are 2 goals down already.

Areola
Wan Bissaka   Mavropanos   Todibo   Scarles
Fernandes     Potts
Bowen Magassa Taty
Pablo

5 at the back, 4 in midfield and a lone striker with no support. 

Fuck all from this one and those cunts will be unbearable after this.

 

Areola

Wan Bissaka   Mavropanos   Todibo   Scarles

Bowen   Soucek(c) Fernandes     Summerville

Pablo        Taty

​​​​​​4-4-2 for me again

​​​​​​Love a Spurs game, hope it goes well

Predictions is kids stuff, but it's very difficult to have any hope, except maybe they are almost as shit as we are and have a boatload of injuries. Need to go ahead to get their fans angry. Suspect this will sadly be another case of 'here comes the charity case that is West Ham to help out another under fire manager'.

Cant see anything except a loss, but as ever will remain hopeful we somehow get 3 points.

Spurs can be shaky but expect they will be feeling optimistic after signing Gallagher this week, expect he will see some game time at some point, off the bench would be my guess, not that i really give a shit. Should we do the unlikely then would imagine that's Frank out the door with his P45.

Anyway, will see what result i wake up to, buggered if I'm getting out of bed!

COYI