Just been announced that Josh Hazlewood will miss the first test due to start in Perth next Friday. This is a big blow to the Australians as they will already be without their captain and no.1 pace bowler Pat Cummins.
Englands preparations for the tour has been questioned by many as they have opted to play no warm up games aside from a one off against the English lions.
Many are saying that its crucial that we get of to a good start in Perth which basically means we cant afford to lose seeing as the 2nd test in Brisbane is a day/night game ( fucking ridiculous) where the Aussies are strongly fancied.
Looking forward to this now but really unsure of how it will play out, I guess I'd still make them slight favourites due to home advantage. Going to be a few all nighters in the coming weeks for me, let's hope it'll be worth it.
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The Ashes.
Forum rules
Whilst 'off-topic' means all non-football topics can be discussed. This is not a free for all. Rights to this area of the forum aren't implicit, and illegal, defamator, spammy or absuive topics will be removed, with the protagonist's sanctioned.
Whilst 'off-topic' means all non-football topics can be discussed. This is not a free for all. Rights to this area of the forum aren't implicit, and illegal, defamator, spammy or absuive topics will be removed, with the protagonist's sanctioned.
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only1billybonds
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only1billybonds
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Re: The Ashes.
Anyone else think that MARNUS bears a resemblance to that banjo plucking, porch dwelling cսnt from ' Deliverance' ?
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Fauxstralian
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Re: The Ashes.
Balls they could have left
And Pope & Crawley were caught & bowled off AIRY FAIRY drives off a fast bowler
And Pope & Crawley were caught & bowled off AIRY FAIRY drives off a fast bowler
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Come On You Irons
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Re: The Ashes.
Fauxstralian wrote: ↑07 Dec 2025, 07:42 Can imagine the top 5 sitting in the dressing room FUMING
We were told to go out and swing at every ball & Stokes comes in and plays like a Test batsman
Root and Brook got out to nicks from good balls. So you're talking shit as per usual.
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Sydney_Iron
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Fauxstralian
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Re: The Ashes.
Can imagine the top 5 sitting in the dressing room FUMING
We were told to go out and swing at every ball & Stokes comes in and plays like a Test batsman
We were told to go out and swing at every ball & Stokes comes in and plays like a Test batsman
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only1billybonds
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only1billybonds
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Re: The Ashes.
Both Stokes and Jack's are scoring at 1 run for every 3 balls faced. Where was this level of discipline in the three previous innings?
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only1billybonds
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Re: The Ashes.
Tak.
I keep hearing from current players that Cricket has changed and some of these old timers are stuck in the past. The one thing that will NEVER change is that unless you play with 'cricket common sense,' you'll get nowhere.
I keep hearing from current players that Cricket has changed and some of these old timers are stuck in the past. The one thing that will NEVER change is that unless you play with 'cricket common sense,' you'll get nowhere.
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Takashi Miike
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Re: The Ashes.
fav comment on this video........
"It seems to me that the captain and coach have created a cult rather than a cricket team."
much like the oddballs that still worship that jock minge
"It seems to me that the captain and coach have created a cult rather than a cricket team."
much like the oddballs that still worship that jock minge
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only1billybonds
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Re: The Ashes.
Well an innings defeat has been avoided but the only thing that will fill yesterday's ( and Perths) cracks is a repeat of Headingly 81.
Be the biggest shock in cricket history if it gets even close to happening.
I listened to a few cricket podcasts yesterday and all the pundits/ex pros said the same thing. Australias 9/10 and 11 showed a greater understanding of whats needed in their situation than our lot could only dream of. The team isnt ( mentally) match fit and we are getting destroyed by what is a bang average test side. England's predicament isn't about talent, its a lack of discipline and in game management.
And to think Cummins and Lyon have yet to feature in this series.
And yes, I'm a fucking idiot. Despite what i said yesterday, my alarm was set for 4am. The Mrs suggests i get tested for some sort of disorder and its very hard to argue against that.
Be the biggest shock in cricket history if it gets even close to happening.
I listened to a few cricket podcasts yesterday and all the pundits/ex pros said the same thing. Australias 9/10 and 11 showed a greater understanding of whats needed in their situation than our lot could only dream of. The team isnt ( mentally) match fit and we are getting destroyed by what is a bang average test side. England's predicament isn't about talent, its a lack of discipline and in game management.
And to think Cummins and Lyon have yet to feature in this series.
And yes, I'm a fucking idiot. Despite what i said yesterday, my alarm was set for 4am. The Mrs suggests i get tested for some sort of disorder and its very hard to argue against that.
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Fauxstralian
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Monsieur merde de cheval
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Re: The Ashes.
Adelaide next up..
shuffle the pack because we're done already... put Rew in for Smith .
Potts for The Jamaican or Atkinson.
Shambles
shuffle the pack because we're done already... put Rew in for Smith .
Potts for The Jamaican or Atkinson.
Shambles
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Monsieur merde de cheval
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Monsieur merde de cheval
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Re: The Ashes.
Massive Attack" wrote: ↑07 Dec 2025, 01:18 How good is Starc though. He's proper on one this series bowling out of his skin. Don't even need Lyon's or Cummins the way he's going.
This England squad are knackered already
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Monsieur merde de cheval
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Re: The Ashes.
Massive Attack" wrote: ↑07 Dec 2025, 01:18 How good is Starc though. He's proper on one this series bowling out of his skin. Don't even need Lyon's or Cummins the way he's going.
Yea he's good...(Starc)...but not that good .
Boland/dogshite/neser..really ..???..
Starc has literally won the ashes on his jack .
35 and after batting for an afternoon ...then destroys a spineless bunch of spazzers not worthy to wear the shirt.
A lazy arsed Jamaican sick note as your main strike bowler says it all with these wankers .
My prediction is this series will go down as the worst ever English ashes squad to visit Australia EVER
Fuckin cunts
I had no idea Trescothick was so fuckin gormless...I do now.
ITS ALL PATHETIC AND UNFORGIVABLE.
Boland/dogshite/neser..really ..???..
Starc has literally won the ashes on his jack .
35 and after batting for an afternoon ...then destroys a spineless bunch of spazzers not worthy to wear the shirt.
A lazy arsed Jamaican sick note as your main strike bowler says it all with these wankers .
My prediction is this series will go down as the worst ever English ashes squad to visit Australia EVER
Fuckin cunts
I had no idea Trescothick was so fuckin gormless...I do now.
ITS ALL PATHETIC AND UNFORGIVABLE.
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Takashi Miike
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Massive Attack
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Re: The Ashes.
How good is Starc though. He's proper on one this series bowling out of his skin. Don't even need Lyon's or Cummins the way he's going.
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Monsieur merde de cheval
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Re: The Ashes.
Fauxstralian wrote: ↑06 Dec 2025, 14:41 Entitled to stand your ground if you don’t think you’ve hit it or given not out but a couple of those were BIG edges & they must have known they were out. Just makes you look stupid
Brook one where he rightly reviewed & then the umpire lost his bottle next ball and didn’t give an obvious edge was amusing
Stokes will stay as captain next summer as there isn’t an obvious replacement
Root will want to concentrate on getting past Tendulkars total
I saw Starc went past Wasim Akram as the leading left arm wicket taker in Tests. Interviewer told him he was now the GOAT of left armers
Starc wasn’t having it & said it was and will always be Wasim
Doing a great job carrying the 4 man attack (Cummins Hazlewood Starc & Lyon) on his own
Stokes will be mentally finished by the end of this fuck up of all fuck ups
I thought the Flintoff tour could ever be trumped for taking the piss...but these spineless wankers are going to make that squad look like bodyline in comparison.
Total fannies and beta men ...when Joe Root is your Alpha male you know youre in serious strife
I thought the Flintoff tour could ever be trumped for taking the piss...but these spineless wankers are going to make that squad look like bodyline in comparison.
Total fannies and beta men ...when Joe Root is your Alpha male you know youre in serious strife
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Monsieur merde de cheval
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Fauxstralian
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Re: The Ashes.
Cummins is the Captain so will obviously resume if as expected he is fit for Adelaide
Imagine Cummins & Lyon will replace Doggett & Neser in the XI
Adding an extra 850 Test wickets
Imagine Cummins & Lyon will replace Doggett & Neser in the XI
Adding an extra 850 Test wickets
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southbankbornnbred
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Re: The Ashes.
Fauxstralian wrote: ↑06 Dec 2025, 13:46 There ARE county players who can play proper red ball cricket
Theyve just been sidelined because they aren’t ‘exciting’ enough
First step would be an English coach who actually cares about England winning Test matches & the Ashes
McCullum? Having a fun time counting his money but will walk away not particularly bothered
Trying to play positive cricket is a good thing but there are times in 5 days where you have to resist or grind the other team
That requires some subtlety & nuance. Relying on a New Zealander for that ? Now THAT is brainless
Totally agree with the Plastic Ponting! 
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Westham67
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Re: The Ashes.
Are we witnessing the end of Bazball? - Analysis
By
Stephan Shemilt
Chief Cricket Reporter
On this Saturday at the Gabba, we had Jofra Archer arriving with a pillow, Michael Vaughan refusing to down a pint with a group of Stormtroopers and Bluey beating Peppa Pig in a vote to be crowned the superior children's cartoon.All seemed more plausible events than an England display of steel, substance and fortitude.England are once again being slaughtered at the Gabbatoir and are left in need of a Christmas miracle on Vulture Street. They cannot lose the series here, but the Ashes will surely be gone before Father Christmas has checked his list twice.There will be a long, long time for recriminations and post-mortem - this series does not end until the second week of January.Are we witnessing the end of the Bazball project? There is a reasonable chance the men in charge of England - Ben Stokes, Brendon McCullum and Rob Key - remain in post regardless of the result, though some deep soul-searching over what this team stands for will be required.Just as Darth Vader arrived in the crowd, Pat Cummins stalked through the media centre as a reminder England have been taking on a 'weakened' Australia team. There is ample opportunity for this tour to get much, much worse.This was supposed to be England's big chance to win in Australia, the most-anticipated Ashes in a generation.Instead, it will be as good as over inside six days and England will only be battling to avoid producing their worst performance in Australia this century.
C+P from BBEB
By
Stephan Shemilt
Chief Cricket Reporter
On this Saturday at the Gabba, we had Jofra Archer arriving with a pillow, Michael Vaughan refusing to down a pint with a group of Stormtroopers and Bluey beating Peppa Pig in a vote to be crowned the superior children's cartoon.All seemed more plausible events than an England display of steel, substance and fortitude.England are once again being slaughtered at the Gabbatoir and are left in need of a Christmas miracle on Vulture Street. They cannot lose the series here, but the Ashes will surely be gone before Father Christmas has checked his list twice.There will be a long, long time for recriminations and post-mortem - this series does not end until the second week of January.Are we witnessing the end of the Bazball project? There is a reasonable chance the men in charge of England - Ben Stokes, Brendon McCullum and Rob Key - remain in post regardless of the result, though some deep soul-searching over what this team stands for will be required.Just as Darth Vader arrived in the crowd, Pat Cummins stalked through the media centre as a reminder England have been taking on a 'weakened' Australia team. There is ample opportunity for this tour to get much, much worse.This was supposed to be England's big chance to win in Australia, the most-anticipated Ashes in a generation.Instead, it will be as good as over inside six days and England will only be battling to avoid producing their worst performance in Australia this century.
C+P from BBEB
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only1billybonds
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Re: The Ashes.
Anyone know if Cummins will resume the captaincy upon his return or will they carry on with 60 grit Smith?
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Fauxstralian
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Re: The Ashes.
Entitled to stand your ground if you don’t think you’ve hit it or given not out but a couple of those were BIG edges & they must have known they were out. Just makes you look stupid
Brook one where he rightly reviewed & then the umpire lost his bottle next ball and didn’t give an obvious edge was amusing
Stokes will stay as captain next summer as there isn’t an obvious replacement
Root will want to concentrate on getting past Tendulkars total
I saw Starc went past Wasim Akram as the leading left arm wicket taker in Tests. Interviewer told him he was now the GOAT of left armers
Starc wasn’t having it & said it was and will always be Wasim
Doing a great job carrying the 4 man attack (Cummins Hazlewood Starc & Lyon) on his own
Brook one where he rightly reviewed & then the umpire lost his bottle next ball and didn’t give an obvious edge was amusing
Stokes will stay as captain next summer as there isn’t an obvious replacement
Root will want to concentrate on getting past Tendulkars total
I saw Starc went past Wasim Akram as the leading left arm wicket taker in Tests. Interviewer told him he was now the GOAT of left armers
Starc wasn’t having it & said it was and will always be Wasim
Doing a great job carrying the 4 man attack (Cummins Hazlewood Starc & Lyon) on his own