ILOVEPAOLODICANIO 10:33 Thu Feb 18
Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I keep trying to pass off Belstaffs one of his mate jetskiing back to London off his head on pills.
Basically make it any Med holiday tale and say I was in magaluf and.... 'my mate was so fucked up he tried to jet ski back to London off his head'.
That was a goodie but I don't think anyone believed it.
What have you told from here?
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Replies - Newest Posts First ( Show In Chronological Order)
Dick Shaftsbury
12:01 Fri Feb 23
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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lab 9:07 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
I can’t remember the wording or indeed the story ….but there was a poster about to do some bird in the rear but changed his mind because it looked like the top of a Daddy’s sauce bottle .
LOL that's fucking hilarious.
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bruuuno
3:27 Fri Feb 23
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I’ve used the shoes falling out of the attic as well it’s a great description.
I think the Spanish foggy island cunts bloke stopped posting after he asked if anyone wanted to meet up for a pint before a game and got roundly cunted off.
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mashed in maryland
10:52 Thu Feb 22
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Leonard Hatred 12:05 Wed Feb 21
Was it you who described having a shit like "a load of old shoes falling out of an attic"?
I've used that if so
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lab
9:07 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I can’t remember the wording or indeed the story ….but there was a poster about to do some bird in the rear but changed his mind because it looked like the top of a Daddy’s sauce bottle .
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Alfs
4:52 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I wrote a film script that had a horse race scene in it, and called one of the horses Lord Zoltan, but the thing never got made.
Another three years that I was paid to waste my fucking time.
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Leonard Hatred
1:14 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Circa 2007, for some reason a poster on here had my phone number.
He rang me at pub closing time, to give me some abuse.
Although unprepared, I shouted blue language at him by way of reply.
By the end of the conversation we were pissing ourselves laughing about it.
This happened several times over a period of about 9 months.
He would call me, from a noisy pub, we would call each other cunts, laugh about it, then hang up.
To this day I don't know who he was 🤔
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Nurse Ratched
1:14 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Spanish, that's it. Well remembered. Or someone pretending to be a Spaniard, at any rate.
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collyrob
1:04 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Wasn’t foggy island cunts, from some Spanish poster?
I told my mates years ago that Joanna lumley had a rubber arsehole from reading it on here😂
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Nurse Ratched
12:57 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Might have been. The 'character' was along those lines.
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Leonard Hatred
12:55 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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NR
HairyHammer?
The pretend Turk?
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Leonard Hatred
12:53 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Best insult ever was "fuck off Davies you Scotch egg faced cunt".
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Nurse Ratched
12:48 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I was genuinely pleased and proud to be included in the insult "You foggy island c##ts" Who was that again?
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ooooh Morley Morley
12:40 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I sometimes tell strangers I’m a cube headed failed estate agent.
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Leonard Hatred
12:05 Wed Feb 21
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I am single-handedly responsible for introducing FMOB into contemporary English vernacular.
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Hammer and Pickle
11:58 Tue Feb 20
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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People still demand an explanation when I express surprise with a FOMB.
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mallard
11:42 Tue Feb 20
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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If someone asks a technical question at work, I’ll often suggest the knob wiping remedy
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Gentile
11:28 Tue Feb 20
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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I've Zoltanerered a lot.
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Hammer I am
11:15 Tue Feb 20
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Yeah fuck me this is 7 years old
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Hammer I am
11:13 Tue Feb 20
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Well confused, this is a years old thread right? That's someone coincidentally dug up at a similar date!?
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Hammer and Pickle
10:56 Tue Feb 20
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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Ah the Mornington Crescent threads! Ah Cameltoe!
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Leonard Hatred
10:53 Tue Feb 20
Re: Stories from WHO you have stolen as your own
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The site is on it's arse these days which is a shame, but there has been some genuine genius stuff on here over the years
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